Patience v Desire to Understand

I’m not a patient person. But I’ve been called patient a lot since raising Wil. And I started to believe I grew in my patience. It’s possible I did.

Last weekend Wil got stuck, and we had a very important wedding to get to. As the clock ticked I grew very frustrated. I wasn’t feeling patient at all. You could say I lost my patience, but it was that very loss that a new realization within me occurred. Patience is not a driving force.

It is a desire to understand.

It’s that simple. And it’s that hard sometimes.

When I was pressed for time, I may have lost my patience, but more importantly is that I lost my desire to understand where Wil’s resistance was coming from. Standing there with the patience of Job wouldn’t have helped any of us without a desire to understand. I thought for a minute.

“Do you want to wear your new outfit in the car?”

Wil looked up at me and nodded.

“Ok, it’s a 2 hour drive and you’ll get all wrinkled. We are stopping at Grandma and Grandpas on the way. How about you change there?”

“Mmhmm,” he agreed. And that was that.

Sometimes it’s not that quick. But sometimes it is. Most importantly, who doesn’t want to feel heard, especially when they can’t find or process the words?

I may have to find patience within, but the desire to understand is what leads the way.